There are times when being a carer drives me to distraction. Sometimes the stress and strain of dealing with it all feels too much. At those times I often feel like walking away. To go to a place where there is just peace instead of constant demands on my time. But in the end I have to bite the bullet and cope. After all, there’s no one else.
Lately things have been hard. I get woken up in the small hours to respond to attacks of pain and nightmares. Often I am lucky if I manage to get a couple of hours sleep which means I feel drained at work. This leads to irritability, a short temper and sometimes outbursts of frustration. Deep down I feel it is so unfair, I feel dumped on. My life has been consumed and is no longer my own. I go nowhere except work. There are no friends anymore. Frankly it is a lonely existence. What’s next? Depression?